Anthrax Hoax Suspect Says He Is Free to Go

Cincinnati, Ohio (SatireWire.com) – Clayton Lee Waagner, arrested last week for allegedly sending 550 anthrax-hoax letters to abortion clinics across the nation, told prison and FBI officials this morning that… Read more

RELIGIOUS MERGER CREATES 900 MILLION HINJEWS

Hinjew leaders today conceded the merger of Hinduism and Judaism has not worked as planned, as instead of forming a super-religion to fight off the common Islamic enemy, they have… Read more

ROBERTSON STEPS DOWN TO ENJOY PRIVATE LIFE OF INTOLERANCE

“Pat Robertson stepped down as leader of the Christian Coalition after more than a decade in charge of the conservative organization.” – AP, Dec. 6, 2001 “My Family Needs Me… Read more

Study: Monogamists With More Than One Spouse May Become Polygamists

Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – According to a National Institutes of Health study, monogamists who are married to more than one spouse at a time have a significantly greater chance of… Read more

STUDENTS DEMAND WARS IN EASIER-TO-FIND COUNTRIES

Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- A delegation of American high school students today demanded the United States stop waging war in obscure nations such as Afghanistan, Kuwait, and Bosnia-Herzegovina, and instead… Read more

NATION PULLS TOGETHER, FALLS OVER

United We Stand, But Divided Into 2 Equal Teams Would Have Been Better Santa Barbara, Cal. (SatireWire.com) – Answering the call from government and civic leaders, Americans all pulled together… Read more

O.J. to Train Ground Troops

Miami, Fla. (SatireWire.com) – Oft-acquitted celebrity O.J. Simpson, exonerated by a jury Wednesday after being charged with road rage, has been hired to train U.S. ground forces massing for a… Read more

OY, YOU NEVER VISIT YOUR MOTHER'S WEB SITE

Miami, Fla. (SatireWire.com) -- I'm thinking of divorcing your father. Oh, you didn't know that, Mr. I-have-no-time-for-the-woman-who-bore-me-and-taught-me-HTML? Well, if you ever bothered to drop by your mother's web site, just… Read more

U.S. TO HALT ATTACKS DURING HOLY MONTH OF HARRY POTTER MOVIE RELEASE

West Anxious to Portray War As Fight Against Terrorism, Not Harry Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Fearing a religious backlash that could undermine international support and intensify anti-American sentiment, the United… Read more

Little Girl Picks Wrong Time to Fall In Well

Orem, Texas (SatireWire.com) – Six-year-old Jessica Waitley, who fell into an abandoned well Monday morning and has yet to be contacted by rescuers or the television media, conceded today that… Read more
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