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MADISON, WI. (SatireWire.com) -- In a move to “keep his enemies close” while also attracting independent voters, presumptive Republican presidential nominee Severely Conservative Mitt Romney today announced he will choose…
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ATLANTA (SatireWire.com) -- As Americans turn out in droves to purchase tickets for Friday’s $640 million lottery drawing, the nation’s managers, supervisors, and administrators are bracing themselves for someone to…
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FALLS CHURCH, VA (SatireWire.com) — The original heart of former Vice President Dick Cheney will receive the nation’s highest honor – the Presidential Medal of Freedom – for its lifelong…
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ORLANDO, FL (SatireWire.com) — A Florida court today ruled that under the state’s “Stand Your Ground” law, which allows people who feel threatened to use deadly force, the life-sized characters…
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CUPUTERINO, CA (SatireWire.com) — Children of divorce report a nearly 50 percent increase in their love for whichever parent is willing to buy them the new Apple iPad 3, according…
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WASHINGTON D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- In what aides described as a “cordial, constructive” meeting on Iran’s nuclear threat, President Obama and Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu agreed Monday that Israel really…
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NEW ORLEANS (SatireWire.com) -- Taking a page from Rush Limbaugh’s penitent play book, NFL defenders who won cash bounties for injuring opponents apologized today, explaining that the “kill shots” they…
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WASHINGTON, D.C. – Rush Limbaugh’s assertion that a Georgetown University coed is a “slut” who should post her sex tapes online so he can watch has upset liberals and conservatives…
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BALTIMORE, MD. (SatireWire.com) — A sperm cell’s hopeful attempts today to convince an egg they should “try it from behind” have so far been rejected by the egg, who called…
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ROME (SatireWire.com) – Moments after today’s announcement that North Korea will halt its nuclear program in exchange for 240,000 metric tons of food, Italy agreed to stop operating cruise ships…
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