Longtime Bear Thinks He's Hot Shit Now

Briefs in a BriefNew York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – Brian Hogan, a perennial Wall Street bear who has been predicting a stock market decline since early 1997, is acting like a complete ass now that he appears to be right.

“What’s up guys, why all the sad faces?” Hogan asked his co-workers during a recent lunch break in the company cafeteria. “Oh hey, that’s right, your stocks are in the fuckin’ toilet! Bwahahahahaha…!

As they have done for the past several days, Hogan’s colleagues refused to acknowledge the remark.

“What’s the matter,” Hogan responded. “Bull got your tongue? Bwahahahahaha! Oh, I can’t ‘bear’ being right all the time! Bwahahahahaha!

Hogan hasn’t gotten laid since 1989.

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