Israel Says Arafat Can Come Out, Really

Jerusalem (SatireWire.com) – Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat, who had been confined to the West Bank city of Ramallah for three months and survived repeated Israeli attacks on his headquarters, was… Read more

Al Qaeda Proposes $249.98 Military Budget

Afghanistan (SatireWire.com) – In response to U.S. President George Bush’s $379 billion proposed military budget, which calls for high-tech weaponry such as pilotless spy aircraft and a missile shield, al… Read more

AP, Reuters in Pitched Spelling Battle

London (SatireWire.com) – The war for Afghanistan intensified today as rival factions from Reuters and the Associated Press launched vicious attacks against one another over whether the United States is… Read more

Senate Bill Declares Bush No Longer Goofy

Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Continuing to display its new spirit of patriotism and bipartisanship, the United States Senate today overwhelmingly passed a resolution declaring that President George W. Bush is… Read more

Nuke Waste Repository Could Turn Moon Into Wasteland

Reno, Nev. (SatireWire.com) – President Bush blasted a plan unveiled Thursday that calls for depositing nuclear waste on the Moon, arguing the radioactive material could turn the lunar surface into… Read more

"Homeless" Reclassified As "Mobile Internet Users"

Washington, D.C.. (SatireWire.com) – According to a new directive from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, the estimated 750,000 Americans once considered “homeless” will be reclassified as “mobile… Read more

Bush Finally Evacuated From White House

Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – In a marked improvement over their response to previous threats, federal agents evacuated President Bush from the White House today, just two days after a small… Read more

Bush Vows To Cut Internet Taxes

Fraser, Mich. (SatireWire.com) – Speaking to a group of young voters at a Michigan campaign stop, Republican George W. Bush boldly pledged to cut Internet taxes in half, and waved… Read more

Ventura's Departure Bodes Ill for Wrestlers

St. Paul, Minn. (SatireWire.com) – Saying he wanted to protect his family’s privacy, Minnesota Gov. Jesse Ventura announced this week he will not run for re-election, yet another sign that… Read more

Lieberman Sits Shiva For Dead Dot-Com

Austin, Texas (SatireWire.com) – In an apparent effort to win support from the Internet industry, Democratic vice presidential candidate Joseph Lieberman sat shiva yesterday with executives of online furniture retailer… Read more
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