NEW HMO STRATEGY: PAY HEALTH CLAIMS

Analysts Skeptical; Doubt Insurers Equipped to Handle Job MINNEAPOLIS, MINN. (SatireWire.com) – Moving into what insurance executives concede is “uncharted territory,” five of the nation’s leading HMOs announced yesterday they… Read more

LAYOFFS, STOCK DROPS PROVE FIRMS BOASTING THEY'D BE "NEXT AMAZON" WERE RIGHT

Some Even Outperform Amazon.com’s Underperformance Reston, Va. (SatireWire.com) – Investors know Internet companies often can’t back up their promises, but one common boast has some dot-com executives crowing “I told… Read more

AP, Reuters in Pitched Spelling Battle

London (SatireWire.com) – The war for Afghanistan intensified today as rival factions from Reuters and the Associated Press launched vicious attacks against one another over whether the United States is… Read more

Californians Start Email Campaign for Energy Conservation

Sacramento, Cal. (SatireWire.com) – Californians, faced with an energy crisis fueled by high-tech power consumption, have launched an email campaign urging fellow computer users to stay off their computers. Days… Read more

Morgan Stanley Misses Estimates Dearly

New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – In an earnings statement that surprised analysts, Morgan Stanley Dean Witter announced this week it missed its third quarter estimates, and wishes like hell they… Read more

Taco Bell Chihuahua Fired; New Chalupa "Tastes Funny"

New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – One week after falling sales caused Taco Bell to ditch its famous Chihuahua, the company unveiled a reformulated chalupa, described as a “crispy, flaky shell… Read more

AOL PROFITS FROM GUMBOLESS SPACE

Dulles, Va. (SatireWire.com) – In his new autobiography, AOL Chairman Steve Case reveals that he never would have become interested in the Internet if space were filled with gumbo. “When… Read more

ELLISON TO GRADS: DIPLOMAS ARE FOR LOSERS

Oracle CEO Urges Students to Drop out, Start up NEW HAVEN, CONN. (SatireWire.com) – In one of the more controversial commencement addresses in memory, Oracle CEO and college dropout Larry… Read more

ENRON CEO KEN LAY'S NEWEST VENTURE

CLICK HERE TO READ RELATED NEWS STORY ______________________________________________________ ENERGY NATIONAL RESOURCE ORGANIZATION of NIGERIA URGENT BUSINESS PROPOSAL PERSONAL AND CONFIDENTIAL From: Mr. Chairman Kenneth Lay Office of E.N.R.O.N. Director Dear… Read more

CONSULTANCY WINS "E-GURGITATE" AWARD

Firm Issues 1000th Study on How Big Corporations Lag the Internet STAMFORD, CONN. (SatireWire.com) – Consulting firm META Group made history today after an independent panel of judges confirmed its… Read more
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