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Companies May Be to Blame For Their Poor Performances

Briefs in a BriefPhiladelphia, Pa. (SatireWire.com) – In a study that has infuriated business and public relations executives, University of Pennsylvania researchers concluded the reason many companies falter is not due to the economy, increases in material costs, or wage pressures, but because the companies are run like shit.

“When a company performs poorly or something goes wrong, it’s long been accepted business practice to blame prevailing market conditions, or a rise in costs, or supply delays, or even a ‘change in the competitive landscape’,” said Greg Kaderle, a professor at Penn’s Wharton School of Business. “But we contend it is also conceivable that some companies are simply run by complete idiots who have no fucking idea what they’re doing.”

Bridgestone/Firestone could not be reached for comment.

*note: the following chart is factual.

Company Trouble Blamed
Sohu.com quarterly results weak online ad sales
Mandalay Resort Group poor earnings weather
JetForm Corp quarterly loss “complex” sales cycles
CacheFlow Inc. earnings change in “buying trends”
Amazon.com disappointing results slowing economy
Disney lower earnings soft ad market; higher programming costs
Razorfish loss, cutbacks corporate tech spending, more complex Internet projects
SeaChange loss order delays
Ford tire problems Firestone
Firestone tire problems Ford customers


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