U.S. PROMISES TO CONSULT ALLIES BEFORE DOING WHAT IT WAS GOING TO DO ANYWAY

Pledges Not to Move Alone Unless It Does Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Bowing to international pressure not to act unilaterally, the United States reversed course today and promised to consult… Read more

AMERICANS OUTRAGED THAT CORPORATIONS CHEAT JUST LIKE THEY DO

“Companies Should Be More Honest,” Says Nation That Walks Away<br>Quickly If Inadvertently Given Too Much Change by Cashier New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – From Enron to Global Crossing, Andersen to… Read more

CHENEY DENIES PUBLIC REEMERGENCE MEANS BUSH THINKS HE'S EXPENDABLE

“Vice President Back in Circulation” – USA Today headline, Feb. 25, 2002 “Secret Service agents shopping for Olympics souvenirs lost a document detailing security plans for Vice President Dick Cheney’s… Read more

HOW TO CHANGE A SPARE GOVERNMENT

“Activating a Cold War-era plan, President Bush has put in place a (100-person) “shadow government” working in secret bunkers outside Washington in case of a catastrophic attack.” — Reuters, March… Read more

CLOSED DISINFORMATION AGENCY CAN'T CONVINCE STAFF IT'S CLOSED

“The Pentagon on Tuesday shut down its short-lived “strategic information” office after media reports suggested it might be used to spread disinformation abroad.” – Reuters, Feb. 26, 2002 “Right, Sure,… Read more

TYPO CAUSES HP AND COMPAQ TO MERDE

Mistake on Proxy Ballots Hits Wall Street Like Bomb Cupertino, Calif. (SatireWire.com) – Embarrassed company officials today revealed that a typographical error on the ballots used to cast votes in… Read more

SCIENTISTS WARN OF GLOBAL COINCIDENCE

Rising Temps, Oceans, and Greenhouse Gas Proof of Weird, Unrelated Happenings Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Sea levels swelled, but still they doubted. Temperatures soared, but still they questioned. Glaciers disappeared,… Read more

RICH AWED BY POOR'S ABILITY TO LIVE LIKE THAT

“No Way We Could Do It,” Say Leaders of Wealthy Nations Monterrey, Mexico (SatireWire.com) – At a United Nations conference last week to address world poverty, dozens of leaders from… Read more

RUDENESS SURVEY PROVES MOST AMERICANS REALLY WHINY

Survey Finds Rudeness Gets Worse.” – AP, April 3, 2002 Majority of 2,000 Respondents Apparently Need to Seriously Get Laid or Something New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – According to a… Read more

GEORGE BUSH IS PREGNANT

Erratic Policy Behavior Result of Massive Hormone Surge Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Though his fainting spell in early February induced a few knowing winks, President George Bush’s erratic foreign policy… Read more
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