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World Bank Wants to Help Afghans Amass Staggering Debt Burden

Briefs in a Brief

Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – The World Bank this week said it plans to extend loans to rebuild Afghanistan once a new government is installed, a pledge bank officials and Afghan opposition leaders agree virtually ensures that the war-torn country’s economy will become stable when penguins fly.

The World Bank and sister organization the International Monetary Fund have assisted countless struggling nations in their efforts to remain struggling nations, and their loans and policies are credited with bringing about the current economic situation in Argentina and the Asian financial crisis. Their multi-billion-dollor efforts to prop up the currencies of Russia and Brazil, meanwhile, were credited with keeping those currencies from not collapsing.

“We are very gratified to know the World Bank wishes to give us money, and we anxiously await the impossibly strict policies attached to these loans that will keep us from being able to escape poverty for decades,” said Afghan tribal leader Hamid Karzai. “We are all very tired of war, and hopeless destitution will be a welcome respite.”


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