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OPRAH LAUNCHES “O2: THE OPRAH WINFREY SISTER”

CHICAGO (SatireWire.com) — Oprah Winfrey, host of the Oprah Winfrey Show, chairman of the Oprah Winfrey Network, and founder of O: The Oprah Magazine, today announced her long-lost sister Patricia has agreed to be called O2: The Oprah Winfrey Sister.

Oprah Winfrey unveils her half-sister 02: The Oprah Winfrey Sister

Winfrey, who revealed the existence of O2: The Oprah Winfrey Sister on her show Monday, said the rebranding will allow O2: The Oprah Winfrey Sister to become instantly recognizable as a member of the Oprah Winfrey media and philanthropic empire, and as a member of Oprah’s family, The Oprah Winfrey Family.

As for the name O2, Winfrey explained it has special significance.

“Well, the O is for Oprah, obviously, but the ‘2’ has double meaning,” she said. “I’m Oprah, I have a sister, so that’s like a second me, or 02. And also Patricia, her former name, starts with a P, which is the letter after O. So if O is 1, then P is 2. So O2=P.

“Although we can’t call her P,” she added. “Because that doesn’t start with O.”

Winfrey discovered she had a half sister last fall, but managed to keep it a secret until her show Monday, when she introduced O2: The Oprah Winfrey Sister to her vast audience. During an often emotional conversation, 02 described the long search for her birth mother, who had given her up for adoption. She learned her real mother was named Vernita Lee, and discovered she and Oprah shared the same mother when watching Lee being interviewed on a television show.

“But how did you make the connection to me?” Winfrey asked.

“Because the caption on the TV said, ‘Vernita Lee: The Oprah Winfrey Mother,’” 02 explained.

Winfrey praised 02: The Oprah Winfrey Sister for keeping the relationship a secret and not selling the story to the tabloids, which staffers confirmed would have been called ‘O the Betrayal: The Story of the Betrayal of Oprah Winfrey,’ had it happened.

“When I found out about her, about how she had kept this secret, I knew I had to meet her,” Winfrey told her audience. “It’s very difficult for me to have secrets. Everyone seems to know everything about me. But families need to have secrets like this. Which is why I’m telling all of you.”

As the audience sighed audibly, 02 reached out for her sibling’s hand.

“I can’t believe my sister is Oprah Winfrey,” she said, choking up.

“And I can’t believe my sister is 02: The Oprah Winfrey Sister,” Winfrey replied.

At the end of the show, Winfrey gave each member of the studio audience a sister.

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