News. Ish.
Thursday September 20th 2018    Become a Fan on Facebook   Follow Us On Twitter

Posts Tagged election 2012

PAUL RYAN SUDDENLY REAL BUSY WHENEVER MITT ROMNEY CALLS

PAUL RYAN SUDDENLY REAL BUSY WHENEVER MITT ROMNEY CALLS

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Paul Ryan hasn’t returned Mitt Romney’s phone calls since the election because he’s probably so busy catching up with work, according to the defeated GOP presidential candidate, who said it’s cool he’ll just, you know, maybe [Read More]

COLORADO LEGALIZES POT; UNIV. OF COLORADO APPS SKYROCKET

COLORADO LEGALIZES POT; UNIV. OF COLORADO APPS SKYROCKET

BOULDER, CO (SatireWire.com) -- Applications to the University of Colorado have shot up 5,000 percent in the past 48 hours, leaving school officials “mystified and delighted” by the influx of more than a million new admissions forms. In other news, Colorado legalized [Read More]

AMERICANS VOTE TO CONTINUE BANGING HEAD AGAINST WALL

AMERICANS VOTE TO CONTINUE BANGING HEAD AGAINST WALL

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- After years of banging their heads against a wall in frustration over the inability of the White House and Congress to work together, Americans went to the polls Tuesday and voted overwhelmingly to continue banging their heads against a [Read More]

ROMNEY, IN DRAG, DENIES HE HAS TACKED TOO FAR LEFT

ROMNEY, IN DRAG, DENIES HE HAS TACKED TOO FAR LEFT

SAN FRANCISCO (SatireWire.com) – In a spirited stump speech today, Mitt Romney denied he has changed positions or tacked to the left, although observers couldn’t help but notice the Governor was dressed in drag and wore a rainbow-colored U.S. lapel pin. [Read More]

OBAMA LOSES DEBATE; ALSO ANY HOPE FOR ANNIVERSARY SEX

OBAMA LOSES DEBATE; ALSO ANY HOPE FOR ANNIVERSARY SEX

DENVER, CO. (SatireWire.com) – Following his weak showing in Wednesday’s debate with Mitt Romney, President Obama’s 20th wedding anniversary ended in further disappointment as sources say the First Lady refused to have anniversary sex with, “a man who has clearly [Read More]

ROMNEY RACKING UP INDIFFERENDORSEMENTS

ROMNEY RACKING UP INDIFFERENDORSEMENTS

Rallying around Mitt Romney in much the same way suicide jumpers rally around the ground, Republican heavyweights have continued to endorse the “inevitable” GOP presidential candidate by using such superlatives as “yeah,” “(let’s) face it,” and “whatever." [Read More]

SOLAR STORM SHUTS DOWN MITT ROMNEY

SOLAR STORM SHUTS DOWN MITT ROMNEY

JACKSONVILLE, FL (SatireWire.com) – The massive solar radiation storm that struck Earth yesterday disrupted radio communications, knocked out satellite and computer systems, and shut down Mitt Romney for more than six hours. [Read More]

PERRY TRIUMPHANTLY LISTS ALL 3 REASONS HE DROPPED OUT

PERRY TRIUMPHANTLY LISTS ALL 3 REASONS HE DROPPED OUT

COLUMBIA, S.C. (SatireWire.com) -- Serial forgetter Rick Perry declared victory today after successfully being able to remember all three reasons he dropped out of the GOP presidential race. [Read More]

VIDEO SHOWS BAIN EXECUTIVES URINATING ON LAID-OFF WORKERS

VIDEO SHOWS BAIN EXECUTIVES URINATING ON LAID-OFF WORKERS

COLUMBIA, S.C. (SatireWire.com) – Efforts to paint Mitt Romney as a heartless corporate raider were reinforced today after a 1992 videotape surfaced showing Bain Capital executives urinating on helpless, laid-off workers. [Read More]

Latest Topics

ALTERNATIVE PUERTO RICO THRIVING AFTER HURRICANE MARIA

ALTERNATIVE PUERTO RICO THRIVING AFTER HURRICANE MARIA

White House officials today said President Trump’s claim that his handling of Hurricane Maria was a “tremendous [Read More]

MORNING SHOW ‘FUCK NO, TALLAHASSEE’ TOPS TV RATINGS

MORNING SHOW ‘FUCK NO, TALLAHASSEE’ TOPS TV RATINGS

Just a month after changing its name from ‘Good Day, Tallahassee’ to ‘Fuck No, Tallahassee,’ WFPE’s early [Read More]

TRUMP TO KEEP FAMILIES TOGETHER, STACKED INTO BORDER WALL

TRUMP TO KEEP FAMILIES TOGETHER, STACKED INTO BORDER WALL

PRES. TRUMP: We’ll call ‘em cinderbacks. Or wetbricks. SESSIONS: We can poll the base to see which makes them [Read More]

TRUMP CANCELS 2018 MIDTERMS TO THWART RUSSIAN MEDDLING

TRUMP CANCELS 2018 MIDTERMS TO THWART RUSSIAN MEDDLING

WASHINGTON, D.C. - In an effort to keep Russia from interfering with democracy, the Trump administration today [Read More]

TRUMP WILL DEPLOY RUSSIAN TROOPS TO PURGE U.S. DEEP STATE

TRUMP WILL DEPLOY RUSSIAN TROOPS TO PURGE U.S. DEEP STATE

President Donald Trump today accepted an offer by Russian President Vladimir Putin to use “impartial” Russian [Read More]

Recent Comments

DAN AND BENJI WORK IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS | SatireWire | dot.com.edy had this to say

— In a surprising disclosure, God revealed this week that He does not determine what happens in human lives, but Read the post

Karlena's Blog - Satire had this to say

http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=5649 Read the post

Karlena's Blog - Satire had this to say

http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=5649 Read the post

Homepage had this to say

... ... Find More Informations here: satirewire.com/content1/?p=5549 ... Read the post

Weiner’s Weiner To Hold Press Conference Amid Growing Scandal | PARODY REPORT - The DRUDGE REPORT of Satire had this to say

Weiner Debacle Sparks Penis-Control Debate Read the post

Archives

Crazy Slots Casino