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	<title>SatireWire &#124; dot.com.edy &#187; election 2012</title>
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		<title>PAUL RYAN SUDDENLY REAL BUSY WHENEVER MITT ROMNEY CALLS</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4477</link>
		<comments>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4477#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 09 Nov 2012 14:44:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Authority]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[election 2012]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[election aftermath]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[future of the republican party]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mitt romney]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[paul ryan]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Paul Ryan hasn’t returned Mitt Romney’s phone calls since the election because he’s probably so busy catching up with work, according to the defeated GOP presidential candidate, who said it’s cool he’ll just, you know, maybe call another time or drop by Ryan’s house, although he has tried that several times but Ryan must not have been home or something. ]]></description>
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		<title>COLORADO LEGALIZES POT; UNIV. OF COLORADO APPS SKYROCKET</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4467</link>
		<comments>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4467#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 08 Nov 2012 18:38:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Authority]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[amendment 64]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[colorado]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[election 2012]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[legalize marijuana]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[legalize pot]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marijuana]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[oregon]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[BOULDER, CO (SatireWire.com) -- Applications to the University of Colorado have shot up 5,000 percent in the past 48 hours, leaving school officials “mystified and delighted” by the influx of more than a million new admissions forms. In other news, Colorado legalized marijuana on Tuesday.]]></description>
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		<title>AMERICANS VOTE TO CONTINUE BANGING HEAD AGAINST WALL</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4461</link>
		<comments>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4461#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 07 Nov 2012 17:43:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Authority]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[barack obama]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[election 2012]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[election results]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fiscal cliff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mitt romney]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[presidential vote]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- After years of banging their heads against a wall in frustration over the inability of the White House and Congress to work together, Americans went to the polls Tuesday and voted overwhelmingly to continue banging their heads against a wall.]]></description>
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		<title>ROMNEY, IN DRAG, DENIES HE HAS TACKED TOO FAR LEFT</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4374</link>
		<comments>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4374#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 11 Oct 2012 18:59:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Authority]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[barack obama]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[election 2012]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mitt romney]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pandering]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[paul ryan]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[presidential election]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[romney ryan]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[SAN FRANCISCO (SatireWire.com) – In a spirited stump speech today, Mitt Romney denied he has changed positions or tacked to the left, although observers couldn’t help but notice the Governor was dressed in drag and wore a rainbow-colored U.S. lapel pin.]]></description>
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		<title>OBAMA LOSES DEBATE; ALSO ANY HOPE FOR ANNIVERSARY SEX</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4307</link>
		<comments>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4307#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 04 Oct 2012 15:38:16 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Authority]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[barack obama]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[debate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[debate 2012]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[election 2012]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mitt romney]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[obama]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[obama romney debate]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[DENVER, CO. (SatireWire.com) – Following his weak showing in Wednesday’s debate with Mitt Romney, President Obama’s 20th wedding anniversary ended in further disappointment as sources say the First Lady refused to have anniversary sex with, “a man who has clearly lost his balls.” ]]></description>
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		<title>ROMNEY RACKING UP INDIFFERENDORSEMENTS</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4211</link>
		<comments>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4211#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 27 Apr 2012 17:29:40 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Authority]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[david souter]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[election 2012]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[endorsements]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mitch mcconnell]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mitt romney]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[newt gingrich]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rick santorum]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Rallying around Mitt Romney in much the same way suicide jumpers rally around the ground, Republican heavyweights have continued to endorse the “inevitable” GOP presidential candidate by using such superlatives as “yeah,” “(let’s) face it,” and “whatever."]]></description>
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		<title>SOLAR STORM SHUTS DOWN MITT ROMNEY</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=3720</link>
		<comments>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=3720#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 25 Jan 2012 18:50:25 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Authority]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[election 2012]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mitt romney]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[newt gingrich]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[solar storms]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[JACKSONVILLE, FL (SatireWire.com) – The massive solar radiation storm that struck Earth yesterday disrupted radio communications, knocked out satellite and computer systems, and shut down Mitt Romney for more than six hours.]]></description>
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		<title>PERRY TRIUMPHANTLY LISTS ALL 3 REASONS HE DROPPED OUT</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=3631</link>
		<comments>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=3631#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 19 Jan 2012 19:13:33 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Authority]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[election 2012]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mitt romney]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[newt gingrich]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rick perry]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[COLUMBIA, S.C. (SatireWire.com) -- Serial forgetter Rick Perry declared victory today after successfully being able to remember all three reasons he dropped out of the GOP presidential race.]]></description>
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		<title>VIDEO SHOWS BAIN EXECUTIVES URINATING ON LAID-OFF WORKERS</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=3601</link>
		<comments>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=3601#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 13 Jan 2012 17:12:13 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Business]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[barack obama]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[election 2012]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[jon huntsman]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mitt romney]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[newt gingrich]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ron paul]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[urinate]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[COLUMBIA, S.C. (SatireWire.com) – Efforts to paint Mitt Romney as a heartless corporate raider were reinforced today after a 1992 videotape surfaced showing Bain Capital executives urinating on helpless, laid-off workers.]]></description>
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