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	<title>SatireWire &#124; dot.com.edy &#187; Sci/Tech</title>
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		<title>MYSTERY DISEASE AFFECTS ONE IN NEARLY EVERY HUMAN BEING</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=5396</link>
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		<pubDate>Tue, 20 Aug 2013 19:27:35 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sci/Tech]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cdc]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Disease]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[pandemic]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[ATLANTA (SatireWire) -- It is known by many names: Common Fulgent Peplepsia,  The Kitchen Dropsy, Male Pattern Balls Cup, Mazelcoffin, and Screamy Screamy Run Run, but one thing is certain: Aparalytic Contradysfunctional Exoficial Disorder affects one in nearly every human being between the ages in the world.]]></description>
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		<title>NASA TURNS OFF SPACE TELESCOPES, GOES OUTSIDE</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=5350</link>
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		<pubDate>Mon, 01 Jul 2013 20:42:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sci/Tech]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[astrophysics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hubble]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[play time]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[space telescope]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Saying everyone had spent more than enough time sitting in front of computer screens and TV monitors, NASA today abruptly turned off all its space telescopes and satellites and told scientists to go outside, for God’s sake. ]]></description>
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		<title>DESIGNER  #HASHTAGS THE LATEST TREND IN TRENDING</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=5269</link>
		<comments>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=5269#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 06 Jun 2013 20:56:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sci/Tech]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hashtags]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[NEW YORK, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – The common #hashtag, once the telltale sign of what’s hot online, is on the way out. In its place, the designer hashtag – bold, colorful, often playful symbols that tell Twitter, Tumblr and the rest that not only are you on top of what’s trending, you’re trending right along with it.]]></description>
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		<title>INTO THE GREAT ABOVE: THE CICADA STORY</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=5212</link>
		<comments>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=5212#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 10 May 2013 21:55:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[17 year cicadas]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cicadas]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cicadas emerge]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[There are a billion stories in cicada city. Some of them are long and some of them are short. Well, actually, all of them are short. Relatively. They're cicadas, not sea turtles. Point is, these are a few of those stories.]]></description>
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		<title>INDIGENOUS MARTIANS THRILLED AT PROSPECT OF BEING COLONIZED</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4975</link>
		<comments>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4975#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 17 Apr 2013 16:10:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sci/Tech]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[colony on mars]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conquistadors]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mars mission]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mars one]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mars project]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[OUT THERE (SatireWire.com) – Word that a private aerospace company is launching a mission to colonize Mars has reached the Red Planet, where the local life forms say they're thrilled at the prospect of being colonized by humans, who have such a strong track record of respecting indigenous cultures. ]]></description>
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		<title>U.S. BRAIN MAPPING PROJECT TO BE BASED ON APPLE MAPS</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4927</link>
		<comments>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4927#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 05 Apr 2013 15:54:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sci/Tech]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[apple]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[apple maps]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[brain mapping]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[brain project]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[CUPERTINO, CA (SatireWire.com) -- Apple today announced its mapping software will be used in the government’s new $100 billion brain mapping project, a decision that has already produced breakthroughs as the software shows the brain is located not inside the human skull as previously thought, but is instead just off the Belt Parkway in Queens. ]]></description>
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		<title>ROCK HARD ASTEROID LONGS TO EXPLODE ALL OVER EARTH</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4754</link>
		<comments>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4754#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 15 Feb 2013 18:58:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sci/Tech]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[asteroid]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[asteroid 2012 da14]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[meteorite]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[near earth collision]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[near earth orbit]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA["C'mon baby, you know you want me," says Asteroid 2012 DA14]]></description>
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		<title>ADM PRODUCES PIG MADE ENTIRELY OF CHICKEN</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4630</link>
		<comments>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4630#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 01 Feb 2013 20:25:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sci/Tech]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[chickens]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[food science]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hybrid animals]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pigs]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[DECATUR, IL. (SatireWire.com) -- Agribusiness giant Archer Daniels Midland today announced it has successfully produced a pig made entirely of chicken. ]]></description>
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		<title>SKYDIVER BREAKS RECORD FOR FREE-FALL SWEARING</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4393</link>
		<comments>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4393#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 15 Oct 2012 13:03:23 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sci/Tech]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[daredevil]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[felix baumgartner]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[free fall record]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[red bull stratos]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[skydive record]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[ROSWELL, N.M. (SatireWire.com) -- In a giant leap from the edge of space Sunday, Austrian skydiver Felix Baumgartner shattered records for supersonic speed, high altitude jumping, and free-fall swearing in a nerve-wracking, 24-mile plunge to Earth.]]></description>
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		<title>MEN LINING UP FOR LIFE-EXTENDING CASTRATIONS</title>
		<link>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4291</link>
		<comments>http://www.satirewire.com/content1/?p=4291#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 26 Sep 2012 15:32:13 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Homepage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sci/Tech]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[NEW YORK, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – Only a day after a new study revealed that castrated men live significantly longer lives, surgical centers around the country were swamped with men demanding to have their testicles removed.]]></description>
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