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BAD PLANET! JUPITER DOING SOMETHING WRONG
Out There (SatireWire.com) - For the second time in a week, humanity watched in fear and awe as a mysterious arm, estimated to be some 3 million light years across, once again appeared to part the black fabric of space, point an angry finger directly at Jupiter, and shout, [Read More]
THE SOU’WESTER ALLIANCE: AFGHANISTAN’S FORGOTTEN WARRIORS
ZARANJ, AFGHANISTAN (SatireWire.com) -- As the dust and smoke of battle settled across Afghanistan, all eyes turned to the triumphant Northern and Eastern alliances, but there is another courageous Afghani confederation whose contributions have been all but lost in the [Read More]
STUDY FINDS WOMEN WHO DRINK WAY MORE FUN TO STUDY
Cambridge, Mass. (SatireWire.com) -- According to a new study on female alcohol use and blood pressure, young women who consume two or three alcoholic drinks a week are much more fun to do research on than women who do not consume alcohol. The report also found that women [Read More]
STUDENTS DEMAND WARS IN EASIER-TO-FIND COUNTRIES
Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- A delegation of American high school students today demanded the United States stop waging war in obscure nations such as Afghanistan, Kuwait, and Bosnia-Herzegovina, and instead attack places they've actually heard of, such as France, [Read More]
REMAINING U.S. CEOs MAKE A BREAK FOR IT
El Paso, Texas (SatireWire.com) -- Unwilling to wait for their eventual indictments, the 10,000 remaining unincarcerated CEOs of U.S. public companies made a break for it yesterday, heading for the Mexican border, plundering towns and villages along the way, and writing [Read More]
OY, YOU NEVER VISIT YOUR MOTHER’S WEB SITE
Miami, Fla. (SatireWire.com) -- I'm thinking of divorcing your father. Oh, you didn't know that, Mr. I-have-no-time-for-the-woman-who-bore-me-and-taught-me-HTML? Well, if you ever bothered to drop by your mother's web site, just once in a while, spare just a few of your [Read More]
