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Sci/Tech Briefs

Pregnant Women Can Fly

Pregnant Women Can Fly

Minneapolis, Minn. (SatireWire.com) -A new report by the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology stating that pregnant women can fly safely until their 36th week is “misleading and dangerous,” according to a 28-year-old Minneapolis woman who, just 30 weeks [Read More]

Study: Monogamists With More Than One Spouse May Become Polygamists

Study: Monogamists With More Than One Spouse May Become Polygamists

Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – According to a National Institutes of Health study, monogamists who are married to more than one spouse at a time have a significantly greater chance of becoming polygamists than those who remain married to only one person. [Read More]

Conptr@Versjal Nev Kkeyboadr Duficulp to Lern^

Conptr@Versjal Nev Kkeyboadr Duficulp to Lern^

DD@11las, =Tewas [(S$at’ireW|re.(om\ – AAA revolYtionary &new kkeybordf moeant to deplace #he trabiitional*l QWERTY arrrranjme3nt ov kkey$ i&s @1moast imnpoS$sible) +o use, aAcCoardng +o U*-ser$ wh07 ar4e Kkeerrurren+|y te$tin9 th%e probbuc+. [Read More]

92 Percent Of Web Sites Made in China

92 Percent Of Web Sites Made in China

New York (SatireWire.com) – In yet another disturbing sign that the Internet continues to be little more than a reflection of American culture, a new study by New York University today revealed that nine out of ten Web sites are made in China. To conduct the study, [Read More]

Sites Offer Large Print for Old People

Sites Offer Large Print for Old People

Sarasota, Fla. (SatireWire.com) – Reacting to new studies claiming people aged 55 and older are the fastest growing segment of new Internet users, hundreds of Web sites have begun offering large print versions, as well as embedding helpful reminders in their text, [Read More]

CMGI + Napster = Wow – Wow

CMGI + Napster = Wow – Wow

Andover, Mass. (SatireWire.com) – In a $1.1 billion deal, Internet holding company CMGI today announced it would merge with online music site Napster to create a company that no one cares about anymore and is probably illegal anyway. “The combined company may [Read More]

Intel Says Not Bunch of “Fancy Dans”

Intel Says Not Bunch of “Fancy Dans”

Santa Clara, Cal. (SatireWire.com) – Chipmaker Intel this morning said a press release issued by the company yesterday stating, “We are fancy Dans with satin hands Una Paloma Blanca over the mountains tiny puppies pass the pistachio nuts nuts nuts with the [Read More]

“Homeless” Reclassified As “Mobile Internet Users”

“Homeless” Reclassified As “Mobile Internet Users”

Washington, D.C.. (SatireWire.com) – According to a new directive from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, the estimated 750,000 Americans once considered “homeless” will be reclassified as “mobile Internet users” who choose to [Read More]

Tiny Net Company Insists It’s a Goddamned Bellwether

Tiny Net Company Insists It’s a Goddamned Bellwether

Wausau, Wis. (SatireWire.com) – Bart Garmon, president and chief executive officer of BartGarmon.com, a now solo Web design shop that is shedding employees and quickly running out of cash, insists his ailing firm should be considered an “Internet [Read More]

To Keep Reader Interest on Web, Sites Work Hard to Make Stories Brief and Make Headlines Snappy, Interesting, and Also Brief, If They Can Do That And Still Get Their Point Across

To Keep Reader Interest on Web, Sites Work Hard to Make Stories Brief and Make Headlines Snappy, Interesting, and Also Brief, If They Can Do That And Still Get Their Point Across

New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – Acknowledging that surfers on the World Wide Web are as short on time as they are on attention span, Internet sites are “working hard” at trying to keep both their headlines and the text of their site copy brief, concise, [Read More]

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Latest Topics

BOWING TO GOP PRESSURE, OBAMA AGREES TO BE EMPEROR OF AMERICA

BOWING TO GOP PRESSURE, OBAMA AGREES TO BE EMPEROR OF AMERICA

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – After repeatedly being labeled a dictator by Republicans and conservative media, [Read More]

SURVEY: MOST AMERICANS OK WITH YOU BEING QUARANTINED

SURVEY: MOST AMERICANS OK WITH YOU BEING QUARANTINED

NEW JERSEY (SatireWire.com) – A new poll shows nine in 10 Americans support a mandatory quarantine for someone who [Read More]

HOBBY LOBBY DECLARES MIDWEST ARTS & CRAFTS CALIPHATE

HOBBY LOBBY DECLARES MIDWEST ARTS & CRAFTS CALIPHATE

OKLAHOMA CITY (SatireWire.com) -- In a brutal and stunning offensive, thousands of Hobby Lobby employees and customers, [Read More]

FAKE DRUG COMPANIES RACING TO CREATE PHONY EBOLA VACCINE

FAKE DRUG COMPANIES RACING TO CREATE PHONY EBOLA VACCINE

NASHVILLE (SatireWire.com) -- With the world in a near-panic, fake pharmaceutical companies and Internet ‘medical [Read More]

SECRET SERVICE HEAD RESIGNS; OBAMA ‘PSYCHED’ TO SLEEP W/O GUN

SECRET SERVICE HEAD RESIGNS; OBAMA ‘PSYCHED’ TO SLEEP W/O GUN

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- President Obama accepted the resignation of Secret Service Director Julia Pierson [Read More]

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