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BAD PLANET! JUPITER DOING SOMETHING WRONG

BAD PLANET! JUPITER DOING SOMETHING WRONG

Out There (SatireWire.com) - For the second time in a week, humanity watched in fear and awe as a mysterious arm, estimated to be some 3 million light years across, once again appeared to part the black fabric of space, point an angry finger directly at Jupiter, and shout, [Read More]

KNIVES, TANKS, WHALES – AIRPORT SCREENERS NOW FAILING TO CATCH ANYTHING

KNIVES, TANKS, WHALES – AIRPORT SCREENERS NOW FAILING TO CATCH ANYTHING

Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- In a troubling sign that investigators may be getting bored with their success smuggling guns and knives onto airplanes, the U.S. Department of Transportation today disclosed that its agents have recently cleared airport security [Read More]

OY, YOU NEVER VISIT YOUR MOTHER’S WEB SITE

OY, YOU NEVER VISIT YOUR MOTHER’S WEB SITE

Miami, Fla. (SatireWire.com) -- I'm thinking of divorcing your father. Oh, you didn't know that, Mr. I-have-no-time-for-the-woman-who-bore-me-and-taught-me-HTML? Well, if you ever bothered to drop by your mother's web site, just once in a while, spare just a few of your [Read More]

AMERICANS ANNOYED BY “ALL THIS INTERNATIONAL SHIT” ON INTERNET

AMERICANS ANNOYED BY “ALL THIS INTERNATIONAL SHIT” ON INTERNET

Web’s Increasingly Worldly Flavor Threatens Americans’ Worldview PULLMAN, WASH. (SatireWire.com) – The profusion of international news available on the Internet has made it increasingly difficult for the average American to ignore the rest of the world, a [Read More]

FOOT-AND-MOUTH BELIEVED TO BE FIRST VIRUS UNABLE TO SPREAD THROUGH MICROSOFT OUTLOOK

Researchers Shocked to Finally Find Virus That Email App Doesn’t Like Atlanta, Ga. (SatireWire.com) – Scientists at the Centers for Disease Control and Symantec’s AntiVirus Research Center today confirmed that foot-and-mouth disease cannot be spread by [Read More]

INVESTORS STUNNED TO LEARN CISCO NOT JUST STOCK, ALSO COMPANY THAT MAKES THINGS

INVESTORS STUNNED TO LEARN CISCO NOT JUST STOCK, ALSO COMPANY THAT MAKES THINGS

Betrayed Shareholders Not Particularly Interested in Routers, Switches San Jose, Cal. (SatireWire.com) – The rumors about Cisco Systems have been circulating for months, but the earnings warning and plunge in its share price Tuesday left little doubt in [Read More]

JUDGE DENIES BIAS AGAINST “GUILTY MICROSOFT BASTARDS”

JUDGE DENIES BIAS AGAINST “GUILTY MICROSOFT BASTARDS”

“My Published Comments About Those Evil Pricks Were Misconstrued,” Jackson Says Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Attempting to keep both his reputation and ruling intact, Judge Thomas Penfield Jackson today apologized for his derogatory public remarks [Read More]

CUBISTS LAUNCH UNNAVIGABLE WEB SITE

CUBISTS LAUNCH UNNAVIGABLE WEB SITE

Conceptual Realism Dominates Site No One Will Be Able to Use Anyway MADRID, SPAIN (SatireWire.com) – The International Society of Cubists officially launched its Web site today, a brilliant rejection of natural form and perspective that metaphysically establishes the [Read More]

CUBIST SOCIETY HOME PAGE

CUBIST SOCIETY HOME PAGE

Read Related Story   Copyright © 2000-2009, SatireWire [Read More]

INTERVIEW WITH THE SEARCH ENGINE

INTERVIEW WITH THE SEARCH ENGINE

EMERYVILLE, CAL. (SatireWire.com) – As random as they are relevant, enigmatic as they are enlightening, search engines have earned a slightly sullied reputation as a necessary evil. But it is a one-sided assessment. The search engines have not been able to explain [Read More]

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Latest Topics

SURVEY: MOST AMERICANS OK WITH YOU BEING QUARANTINED

SURVEY: MOST AMERICANS OK WITH YOU BEING QUARANTINED

NEW JERSEY (SatireWire.com) – A new poll shows nine in 10 Americans support a mandatory quarantine for someone who [Read More]

HOBBY LOBBY DECLARES MIDWEST ARTS & CRAFTS CALIPHATE

HOBBY LOBBY DECLARES MIDWEST ARTS & CRAFTS CALIPHATE

OKLAHOMA CITY (SatireWire.com) -- In a brutal and stunning offensive, thousands of Hobby Lobby employees and customers, [Read More]

FAKE DRUG COMPANIES RACING TO CREATE PHONY EBOLA VACCINE

FAKE DRUG COMPANIES RACING TO CREATE PHONY EBOLA VACCINE

NASHVILLE (SatireWire.com) -- With the world in a near-panic, fake pharmaceutical companies and Internet ‘medical [Read More]

SECRET SERVICE HEAD RESIGNS; OBAMA ‘PSYCHED’ TO SLEEP W/O GUN

SECRET SERVICE HEAD RESIGNS; OBAMA ‘PSYCHED’ TO SLEEP W/O GUN

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- President Obama accepted the resignation of Secret Service Director Julia Pierson [Read More]

SCOTS VOTE TO STAY IN UK; “YES” VOTERS TO BE HANGED AS REBELS

SCOTS VOTE TO STAY IN UK; “YES” VOTERS TO BE HANGED AS REBELS

LONDON (SatireWire.com) -- Declaring the rebels “will pay with their lives,” Queen Elizabeth II today revealed [Read More]

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