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M.I.T. SPAM STUDY FINDS INSTANT WEALTH, SEXY COEDS JUST A CLICK AWAY!

M.I.T. SPAM STUDY FINDS INSTANT WEALTH, SEXY COEDS JUST A CLICK AWAY!

Generous Offers to Share Secrets Restore Researchers’ Faith in Humanity CAMBRIDGE, MASS. (SatireWire.com) – A two-year M.I.T. study of unsolicited email, or “spam,” has concluded that you can earn $50,000 in the next 90 days by sending e-mail from [Read More]

SURVEY: MAJORITY OF WEB USERS ARE FBI AGENTS POSING AS TEENAGE GIRLS

SURVEY: MAJORITY OF WEB USERS ARE FBI AGENTS POSING AS TEENAGE GIRLS

Survey Shows Evolving Web No Longer Dominated by Male Techies NEW YORK, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – The Internet reached a demographic milestone this week as a new study revealed that for the first time, the majority of U.S. Internet users are FBI agents posing as teenage [Read More]

SOMALIS LIVE IN FEAR OF LOOMING INTERNET BUBBLE

SOMALIS LIVE IN FEAR OF LOOMING INTERNET BUBBLE

Rival Tribe Leaders Claim They Can Stop Giant Bubble from Devestation MOGADISHU, SOMALIA (SatireWire.com) – Red Cross officials in Somalia, which in September became the last African nation to go online, appealed for calm today as the country anxiously awaits the [Read More]

NET STRUCK BY WAVE OF TANGENTIALISM CLOUDS DEPRESS ME

NET STRUCK BY WAVE OF TANGENTIALISM CLOUDS DEPRESS ME

Hackers Suspected of Spreading Code that Causes Like Save the Whales Big Splash RESTON, VA. (SatireWire.com) – Internet sites from Ashford.com to ZDNet today reported being hit by a mysterious wave of tangentialism, with the content on many sites rendered almost [Read More]

SOUTH DAKOTA GOES DIGITAL

SOUTH DAKOTA GOES DIGITAL

PIERRE, S.D. (SatireWire.com) – As his first act in office, Gov. Jim Barksdale signed an executive order today renaming the state “E-Dakota.” The state’s 860,000 residents, as well as livestock, personal belongings, and public and private buildings, [Read More]

APPEALS COURT RULES MICROSOFT NEEDS MORE TIME TO KILL OFF COMPETITORS

Netscape Knocked Off During First Trial Phase, Oracle Will Take Longer Washington, D.C. (SatireWire) – A federal appeals court Thursday reversed the Microsoft breakup and sent the case back to a lower court, ruling that the software giant violated antitrust laws, but [Read More]

SETI PROJECT TURNS DOWN ALIEN HELP

SETI PROJECT TURNS DOWN ALIEN HELP

Extraterrestrial Search “Going Just Fine” Without Extraterrestrial Interference Berkeley, Cal. (SatireWire.com) – Scientists for SETI@home, the worldwide project that uses millions of personal computers to aid in the search for extraterrestrial life, said [Read More]

DELL SUPPORTS EXTENDING GATEWAY AMNESTY

DELL SUPPORTS EXTENDING GATEWAY AMNESTY

Gateway Denies Amnesty Exists; Dell Says Just Trying to Help Round Rock, Texas (SatireWire.com) – Dell Computer today said it supports extending the amnesty period for anyone possessing a Gateway computer, arguing Gateway owners should be given “at least” [Read More]

BUG FOUND IN OFFICE XP MAKES SOFTWARE VULNERABLE TO LACK OF INTEREST IN OFFICE XP

BUG FOUND IN OFFICE XP MAKES SOFTWARE VULNERABLE TO LACK OF INTEREST IN OFFICE XP

Microsoft Hopes to Issue Patch Giving People Better Reasons to Upgrade Redmond, Wash. (SatireWire.com) – Less than a week after kicking off what it called its “most important” software launch this year, Microsoft today conceded Office XP contains a major [Read More]

YAHOO! SAYS PORN SALES WON’T CHANGE COMPANY, NEW YAHOOTERS! GIRLS “JUST AN EXPERIMENT”

“We’re hard and fast on being the largest enabler of commerce on the Web. We have chosen to offer adult-oriented content as part of that.” — Yahoo! President Jeff Mallett, Reuters, April 11, 2001, (emphasis ours; words his). Girls Will Answer Your [Read More]

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Latest Topics

SURVEY: MOST AMERICANS OK WITH YOU BEING QUARANTINED

SURVEY: MOST AMERICANS OK WITH YOU BEING QUARANTINED

NEW JERSEY (SatireWire.com) – A new poll shows nine in 10 Americans support a mandatory quarantine for someone who [Read More]

HOBBY LOBBY DECLARES MIDWEST ARTS & CRAFTS CALIPHATE

HOBBY LOBBY DECLARES MIDWEST ARTS & CRAFTS CALIPHATE

OKLAHOMA CITY (SatireWire.com) -- In a brutal and stunning offensive, thousands of Hobby Lobby employees and customers, [Read More]

FAKE DRUG COMPANIES RACING TO CREATE PHONY EBOLA VACCINE

FAKE DRUG COMPANIES RACING TO CREATE PHONY EBOLA VACCINE

NASHVILLE (SatireWire.com) -- With the world in a near-panic, fake pharmaceutical companies and Internet ‘medical [Read More]

SECRET SERVICE HEAD RESIGNS; OBAMA ‘PSYCHED’ TO SLEEP W/O GUN

SECRET SERVICE HEAD RESIGNS; OBAMA ‘PSYCHED’ TO SLEEP W/O GUN

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- President Obama accepted the resignation of Secret Service Director Julia Pierson [Read More]

SCOTS VOTE TO STAY IN UK; “YES” VOTERS TO BE HANGED AS REBELS

SCOTS VOTE TO STAY IN UK; “YES” VOTERS TO BE HANGED AS REBELS

LONDON (SatireWire.com) -- Declaring the rebels “will pay with their lives,” Queen Elizabeth II today revealed [Read More]

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