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Intl-Briefs

U.S. Drops Cats Into Belgium

U.S. Drops Cats Into Belgium

Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Countering accusations from liberals and conservatives alike that U.S. policy in the Middle East has become “confused and incoherent,” the Bush administration today announced that it has in fact parachuted 225,000 cats [Read More]

Australia Reclassifies Refugee Detainment as Sport

Australia Reclassifies Refugee Detainment as Sport

Woomera, Australia (SatireWire.com) – In a deft maneuver that effectively puts an end to protests over its policy of mandatory detention for refugees, the Australian government today declared the confinement of asylum seekers as a sport. “Sport, eh? Well, why [Read More]

Bush Calls For Mideast Truce So U.S. Can Attack Iraq

Bush Calls For Mideast Truce So U.S. Can Attack Iraq

Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Complaining that the window of opportunity was closing, an exasperated President Bush today called on Israelis and Palestinians to declare an immediate cease fire in order to allow the United States to invade Iraq. “Look, I [Read More]

Ships, Thatcher, No Longer “She”

Ships, Thatcher, No Longer “She”

London (SatireWire.com) – The shipping industry newspaper Lloyd’s List, one of the world’s oldest publications, announced Wednesday it will no longer use the feminine pronoun “she” when referring to ships, but would instead use the more neutral [Read More]

Zimbabwe Challenger Shocked at Loss; Also Beaten

Zimbabwe Challenger Shocked at Loss; Also Beaten

Harare, Zimbabwe (SatireWire.com) – Asked to comment Thursday about his loss to Zimbabwe President Robert Mugabe in this week’s election, which has been called a fraud by many in the West, opposition leader Morgan Tsvangirai said he was “shocked.” [Read More]

Al Qaeda Proposes $249.98 Military Budget

Al Qaeda Proposes $249.98 Military Budget

Afghanistan (SatireWire.com) – In response to U.S. President George Bush’s $379 billion proposed military budget, which calls for high-tech weaponry such as pilotless spy aircraft and a missile shield, al Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden proposed a $249.98 fiscal [Read More]

India Sends Message by Invading

India Sends Message by Invading

New Delhi, India (SatireWire.com) – In what observers say is likely to further strain already tense relations between the two countries, India today sent a stern message to neighboring Pakistan by invading it. Nearly two million Indian ground troops, supported by [Read More]

Putin Says We’re Indepedent, Says Media

Putin Says We’re Indepedent, Says Media

Moscow (SatireWire.com) – In a surprising show of support, Russian television stations today said they doubted President Vladimir Putin was attempting to crush dissent on Tuesday when he shut down the last nationwide TV station not run by the state. “President [Read More]

Argentina Institutes Presidential Draft

Argentina Institutes Presidential Draft

Buenos Aires (SatireWire.com) – In an effort to fill its depleting ranks of potential leaders, Argentina’s Congress today implemented a nationwide draft that requires all citizens age 18 and over to serve as the country’s president for a minimum of two [Read More]

AP, Reuters in Pitched Spelling Battle

AP, Reuters in Pitched Spelling Battle

London (SatireWire.com) – The war for Afghanistan intensified today as rival factions from Reuters and the Associated Press launched vicious attacks against one another over whether the United States is fighting Osama bin Laden’s al Qaeda network, or Osama bin [Read More]

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Latest Topics

SURVEY: MOST AMERICANS OK WITH YOU BEING QUARANTINED

SURVEY: MOST AMERICANS OK WITH YOU BEING QUARANTINED

NEW JERSEY (SatireWire.com) – A new poll shows nine in 10 Americans support a mandatory quarantine for someone who [Read More]

HOBBY LOBBY DECLARES MIDWEST ARTS & CRAFTS CALIPHATE

HOBBY LOBBY DECLARES MIDWEST ARTS & CRAFTS CALIPHATE

OKLAHOMA CITY (SatireWire.com) -- In a brutal and stunning offensive, thousands of Hobby Lobby employees and customers, [Read More]

FAKE DRUG COMPANIES RACING TO CREATE PHONY EBOLA VACCINE

FAKE DRUG COMPANIES RACING TO CREATE PHONY EBOLA VACCINE

NASHVILLE (SatireWire.com) -- With the world in a near-panic, fake pharmaceutical companies and Internet ‘medical [Read More]

SECRET SERVICE HEAD RESIGNS; OBAMA ‘PSYCHED’ TO SLEEP W/O GUN

SECRET SERVICE HEAD RESIGNS; OBAMA ‘PSYCHED’ TO SLEEP W/O GUN

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- President Obama accepted the resignation of Secret Service Director Julia Pierson [Read More]

SCOTS VOTE TO STAY IN UK; “YES” VOTERS TO BE HANGED AS REBELS

SCOTS VOTE TO STAY IN UK; “YES” VOTERS TO BE HANGED AS REBELS

LONDON (SatireWire.com) -- Declaring the rebels “will pay with their lives,” Queen Elizabeth II today revealed [Read More]

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