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CANADIAN WARSHIP SEIZES TANKER IN… WAIT… CANADA HAS A WARSHIP?

CANADIAN WARSHIP SEIZES TANKER IN… WAIT…  CANADA HAS A WARSHIP?

ARABIAN SEA (SatireWire.com) -- Canadian television reported Friday that a Canadian warship in the Arabian Sea had seized a tanker suspected of smuggling oil from Iraq, leading many to suspect that the report was a hoax. "You're kidding, right? Canada has a warship?" asked [Read More]

THE SOU’WESTER ALLIANCE: AFGHANISTAN’S FORGOTTEN WARRIORS

THE SOU’WESTER ALLIANCE: AFGHANISTAN’S FORGOTTEN WARRIORS

ZARANJ, AFGHANISTAN (SatireWire.com) -- As the dust and smoke of battle settled across Afghanistan, all eyes turned to the triumphant Northern and Eastern alliances, but there is another courageous Afghani confederation whose contributions have been all but lost in the [Read More]

U.N. SETS “GLOBAL MARCH MADNESS” FIELD

U.N. SETS “GLOBAL MARCH MADNESS” FIELD

Selection Committee Gives U.S., China No. 1 seeds; Iraq a No. 3 in Mideast New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) Update – “March Madness,” the sobriquet of America’s NCAA college basketball tournament, has spilled over to the international arena, as the [Read More]

GLOBAL MARCH MADNESS: EAST REGIONAL BREAKDOWN

GLOBAL MARCH MADNESS: EAST REGIONAL BREAKDOWN

Bill: No question about it, Don, the selection committee really stacked the East. This bracket is loaded from top to bottom. Don: I’ll say. Pakistan v. Thailand in a first-round matchup of the 3 and 14 seeds? In a word, Dynamite. Bill: In another word, Opium. Either [Read More]

GLOBAL MARCH MADNESS: WEST REGIONAL BREAKDOWN

GLOBAL MARCH MADNESS: WEST REGIONAL BREAKDOWN

Bill: The West is the only region with 15 teams, and the only bracket where the top seed gets a bye. I understand that’s a pretty complicated process, Don. Perhaps you could explain to the folks out there exactly how the U.N. selection committee allowed just one [Read More]

GLOBAL MARCH MADNESS: SOUTH REGIONAL BREAKDOWN

GLOBAL MARCH MADNESS: SOUTH REGIONAL BREAKDOWN

Don: In the South regional, I love the 5-12 matchup between Microsoft and Cuba. One still a state-run monopoly, the other a monopoly still running from the states. Bill: You know, Don, some people questioned whether Microsoft should be here at all, since they don’t [Read More]

GLOBAL MARCH MADNESS: MIDEAST REGIONAL BREAKDOWN

GLOBAL MARCH MADNESS: MIDEAST REGIONAL BREAKDOWN

Don: With a bracket called the Mideast, you’d expect some pretty fierce matchups, but the committee must have had a history teacher at the helm to steer these teams into the same region. Bill: You said it, Don. When it’s tournament-time, you need momentum coming [Read More]

TORMENTED BY NEW U.N. CLASSMATES, SWITZERLAND ALREADY WANTS TO GO HOME

TORMENTED BY NEW U.N. CLASSMATES, SWITZERLAND ALREADY WANTS TO GO HOME

“The Swiss voted Sunday to join the United Nations, moving their country warily but decisively closer to the international community after centuries of neutrality and independence.” – L.A. Times, March 4 “Everybody’s Mean to Me, and the Food [Read More]

Zimbabwe Changes Name to AAA Zimbabwe

Zimbabwe Changes Name to AAA Zimbabwe

Harare, AAA Zimbabwe (SatireWire.com) – Zimbabwe today officially changed its name to AAA Zimbabwe, vaulting 188 places in the United Nations Membership Directory in an attempt to catch the eye of anyone browsing for country-related products and services. “The [Read More]

Bin Laden Hit Hard By News Of His Death

Bin Laden Hit Hard By News Of His Death

Washington, D.C (SatireWire.com) – News this week from the FBI’s top official for counterterrorism that Osama bin Laden was “probably not with us anymore” has shaken the al Qaeda leader, who had spent the past 10 months believing he was alive. The [Read More]

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Latest Topics

SURVEY: MOST AMERICANS OK WITH YOU BEING QUARANTINED

SURVEY: MOST AMERICANS OK WITH YOU BEING QUARANTINED

NEW JERSEY (SatireWire.com) – A new poll shows nine in 10 Americans support a mandatory quarantine for someone who [Read More]

HOBBY LOBBY DECLARES MIDWEST ARTS & CRAFTS CALIPHATE

HOBBY LOBBY DECLARES MIDWEST ARTS & CRAFTS CALIPHATE

OKLAHOMA CITY (SatireWire.com) -- In a brutal and stunning offensive, thousands of Hobby Lobby employees and customers, [Read More]

FAKE DRUG COMPANIES RACING TO CREATE PHONY EBOLA VACCINE

FAKE DRUG COMPANIES RACING TO CREATE PHONY EBOLA VACCINE

NASHVILLE (SatireWire.com) -- With the world in a near-panic, fake pharmaceutical companies and Internet ‘medical [Read More]

SECRET SERVICE HEAD RESIGNS; OBAMA ‘PSYCHED’ TO SLEEP W/O GUN

SECRET SERVICE HEAD RESIGNS; OBAMA ‘PSYCHED’ TO SLEEP W/O GUN

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- President Obama accepted the resignation of Secret Service Director Julia Pierson [Read More]

SCOTS VOTE TO STAY IN UK; “YES” VOTERS TO BE HANGED AS REBELS

SCOTS VOTE TO STAY IN UK; “YES” VOTERS TO BE HANGED AS REBELS

LONDON (SatireWire.com) -- Declaring the rebels “will pay with their lives,” Queen Elizabeth II today revealed [Read More]

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