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ARAFAT, SHARON WALK OFF SET OF “ISRAEL”

ARAFAT, SHARON WALK OFF SET OF “ISRAEL”

Temperamental Stars Say They’re Tired of Playing Dogmatic Jerks Jerusalem (SatireWire.com) – Sources on the set of “Israel,” history’s longest-running drama, say irascible stars Prime Minister Ariel Sharon and Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat [Read More]

BUSH ASKS NON-U.S. OLYMPIANS TO UNITE BEHIND AMERICA BY FINISHING BEHIND AMERICA

BUSH ASKS NON-U.S. OLYMPIANS TO UNITE BEHIND AMERICA BY FINISHING BEHIND AMERICA

“Get ready for a red, white and blue Olympics.” — Associated Press “Don’t Let Enemies of Freedom Celebrate Our Losses,” Says President Bush Park City, Utah (SatireWire.com) – Saying there could be no greater blow to the enemies of [Read More]

FORMER CANNIBALS LONGING FOR COMFORT FOOD

FORMER CANNIBALS LONGING FOR COMFORT FOOD

KUBALUVA ISLANDS (SatireWire.com) - It's not just stressed-out Americans who are finding comfort in fatty, familiar foods these days, and police on this tiny Pacific atoll have a stack of missing persons reports to prove it. [Read More]

AFGHAN MOUNTAINS SURRENDER!

AFGHAN MOUNTAINS SURRENDER!

Those Who Said Bombs Wasted on Mountains Proved Wrong Pamir Knot, Afghanistan (SatireWire.com) – After weeks of relentless bombing that has taken a devastating toll, the mountains of Afghanistan unconditionally surrendered to the United States today. U.S. Defense [Read More]

U.S. TO HALT ATTACKS DURING HOLY MONTH OF HARRY POTTER MOVIE RELEASE

U.S. TO HALT ATTACKS DURING HOLY MONTH OF HARRY POTTER MOVIE RELEASE

West Anxious to Portray War As Fight Against Terrorism, Not Harry Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Fearing a religious backlash that could undermine international support and intensify anti-American sentiment, the United States today announced it will halt attacks [Read More]

MILITANT MODERATES STAGE MASSIVE LACK OF PROTESTS

MILITANT MODERATES STAGE MASSIVE LACK OF PROTESTS

Police Not Called in to Put Down Mild and Ruly Crowds Across Middle East Karachi, Pakistan (SatireWire.com) – Alarmed almost to the point of action, millions of radical moderates across the Middle East and Asia today didn’t take to the streets in what [Read More]

BRAWL ERUPTS AT WORLD ECONOMIC FORUM WEIGH-IN

BRAWL ERUPTS AT WORLD ECONOMIC FORUM WEIGH-IN

Gates Bites AOL Rival; Critics Call for End to “Weigh-In Circuses” New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – After a massive brawl involving hundreds of world leaders and business heavyweights, World Economic Forum organizers today said they may discontinue the [Read More]

ENRON ADMITS IT’S REALLY ARGENTINA

ENRON ADMITS IT’S REALLY ARGENTINA

Now Massive Ineptitude, Corruption Make More Sense, Analysts Say Houston, Texas (SatireWire.com) – Energy company Enron, which collapsed due to gross mismanagement and insurmountable debt, today confessed to what many observers had long suspected: it is actually [Read More]

BIN LADEN FEARED TO HAVE SEGWAY SCOOTER

BIN LADEN FEARED TO HAVE SEGWAY SCOOTER

Has Threatened to Produce Transportation Device of Mass Distribution Kandahar, Afghanistan (SatireWire.com) – U.S. forces searching an abandoned Al Qaeda hideout today said they found diagrams of skateboards, gyroscopic technology, and a drawing of Osama bin Laden [Read More]

EUROPE NOT USED TO NOT BEING IGNORED

EUROPE NOT USED TO NOT BEING IGNORED

G.E.’s Acquiescence Threatens Delicate Balance of Transatlantic Mutual Disdain The Hague (SatireWire.com) – Europe and the U.S. are said to be furious with General Electric after the American firm hinted it may actually succumb to European pressure and cancel [Read More]

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Latest Topics

U.S. TROOPS TO FIGHT EACH OTHER TILL MIDDLE EAST SORTS ITSELF OUT

U.S. TROOPS TO FIGHT EACH OTHER TILL MIDDLE EAST SORTS ITSELF OUT

BAGHDAD (SatireWire.com) – With the Middle East hopelessly fractured and America's allies increasingly [Read More]

STRONG SALES PROVE AMERICANS WOULD RATHER DIE IN A CHEVROLET

STRONG SALES PROVE AMERICANS WOULD RATHER DIE IN A CHEVROLET

DETROIT (SatireWire.com) – Despite breaking industry records for safety recalls, General Motors this week announced [Read More]

GM SPLITS INTO SEPARATE CAR-MAKING, CAR-RECALLING DIVISIONS

GM SPLITS INTO SEPARATE CAR-MAKING, CAR-RECALLING DIVISIONS

DETROIT (SatireWire.com) – General Motors today announced it will split into separate car-making and car-recalling [Read More]

FIFA ORDERS SUAREZ TO BE PUT DOWN

FIFA ORDERS SUAREZ TO BE PUT DOWN

NATAL, BRAZIL (SatireWire.com) -- After a third biting incident in four years, Uruguayan striker Luis Suarez will be [Read More]

CREATIONIST TELESCOPE FINDS NEARLY 6,000-YEAR-OLD GALAXY

CREATIONIST TELESCOPE FINDS NEARLY 6,000-YEAR-OLD GALAXY

PETERSBURG, KY (SatireWire.com) – Creationists using a deep-faith telescope said today they have discovered a galaxy [Read More]

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