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PAPAL FRONTRUNNERS EXPOSED (not like that)

PAPAL FRONTRUNNERS EXPOSED (not like that)

VATICAN CITY (SatireWire.com) -- Here are the leading candidates to replace Pope Benedict XVI, arranged in random order, unless you don't believe in random, in which case the first guy is the next pope. Obviously. [Read More]

TALIBAN ALSO WILL ARM WOMEN TO FIGHT OPPRESSORS… OH, WAIT

TALIBAN ALSO WILL ARM WOMEN TO FIGHT OPPRESSORS… OH, WAIT

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Responding to America’s decision to allow women in combat, Taliban leaders today vowed to give guns to their women too so they could fight off their oppressors, until they realized that would be them. [Read More]

NORTH KOREA WARNS MISSILES CAN REACH U.S. IN 2 DAYS VIA UPS

NORTH KOREA WARNS MISSILES CAN REACH U.S. IN 2 DAYS VIA UPS

PYONGYANG (SatireWire.com) -- Reacting to South Korea’s recent deal with the United States to extend the range of its missiles, North Korea surprised the world Tuesday by claiming it now has missiles that can reach the U.S. mainland. If those missiles are sent via UPS 2nd [Read More]

N. KOREA APPARENTLY PLANS TO LITTER WORLD INTO SUBMISSION

N. KOREA APPARENTLY PLANS TO LITTER WORLD INTO SUBMISSION

PYONGYANG (SatireWire.com) -- North Korea on Thursday launched what appears to be a new type of disintegrating missile that officials warn could pose a significant threat to any nation other than the one it’s pointed at. [Read More]

U.S., ISRAEL AGREE ISRAEL DOESN’T GIVE A SHIT WHAT U.S. THINKS

U.S., ISRAEL AGREE ISRAEL DOESN’T GIVE A SHIT WHAT U.S. THINKS

WASHINGTON D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- In what aides described as a “cordial, constructive” meeting on Iran’s nuclear threat, President Obama and Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu agreed Monday that Israel really doesn’t give a shit what the U.S. thinks. [Read More]

STUDY CONCLUDES BEIJING IS 13 HOURS AHEAD OF WASHINGTON

STUDY CONCLUDES BEIJING IS 13 HOURS AHEAD OF WASHINGTON

WASHINGTON D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- A three-year government economic study has concluded the U.S. has fallen behind China because Beijing is 13 hours ahead of Washington and therefore knows what’s going to happen more than half a day before the United States. [Read More]

CNN ACCIDENTALLY AIRS FOOTAGE OF UPCOMING U.S.-IRAN WAR

CNN ACCIDENTALLY AIRS FOOTAGE OF UPCOMING U.S.-IRAN WAR

ATLANTA (SatireWire.com) -- Pentagon officials were furious with CNN today after the network failed to respect a media embargo and accidentally aired footage of a successful Navy missile strike from the third week of the upcoming U.S.-Iran war. [Read More]

CHINA TO MANUFACTURE CHEAPER AMERICAN BABIES

CHINA TO MANUFACTURE CHEAPER AMERICAN BABIES

BEIJING (SatireWire.com) – In a further blow to U.S. manufacturing, China today announced it will produce American babies at one-tenth the cost of its U.S. counterparts. [Read More]

BRITISH FREEDOM RIOTERS LIBERATE TVs, SHOES, COMPUTERS

BRITISH FREEDOM RIOTERS LIBERATE TVs, SHOES, COMPUTERS

LONDON (SatireWire.com) – The clarion of freedom that sounded across North Africa last Spring has finally reached Britain, where for the fourth straight night rioters wielded the bricks of revolution to break down the tyranny of shop windows and the despotism of display [Read More]

MURDOCH TO CLOSE SCOTLAND YARD

MURDOCH TO CLOSE SCOTLAND YARD

LONDON (SatireWire.com) -- Britain’s phone-hacking scandal has claimed another News International subsidiary as media baron Rupert Murdoch today told Parliament he will shut down Scotland Yard. [Read More]

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Latest Topics

ROCK HARD ASTEROID LONGS TO EXPLODE ALL OVER EARTH

ROCK HARD ASTEROID LONGS TO EXPLODE ALL OVER EARTH

"C'mon baby, you know you want me," says Asteroid 2012 DA14 [Read More]

PEACE CORPS EXPANDS TO COVER SUDAN, ERITREA, CARNIVAL CRUISES

PEACE CORPS EXPANDS TO COVER SUDAN, ERITREA, CARNIVAL CRUISES

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- The Peace Corps today announced it will expand its third-world missions by [Read More]

PAPAL FRONTRUNNERS EXPOSED (not like that)

PAPAL FRONTRUNNERS EXPOSED (not like that)

VATICAN CITY (SatireWire.com) -- Here are the leading candidates to replace Pope Benedict XVI, arranged in random [Read More]

STEVEN CHU SULKING OVER U.S. GOVT NOT GETTING WIPED OUT

STEVEN CHU SULKING OVER U.S. GOVT NOT GETTING WIPED OUT

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- Sulking Energy Secretary Steven Chu, the cabinet member designated to sit out the [Read More]

BOEING INTRODUCES THE NEW 797 DREAMDRONE

BOEING INTRODUCES THE NEW 797 DREAMDRONE

CHICAGO (SatireWire.com) -- Targeting the growing drone market, Boeing today unveiled the 797 Dreamdrone, describing it [Read More]

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