News. Ish.
Thursday October 23rd 2014    Become a Fan on Facebook   Follow Us On Twitter

Sports

NFL PLAYERS SAY INJURING OPPONENTS MEANT TO BE HUMOROUS

NFL PLAYERS SAY INJURING OPPONENTS MEANT TO BE HUMOROUS

NEW ORLEANS (SatireWire.com) -- Taking a page from Rush Limbaugh’s penitent play book, NFL defenders who won cash bounties for injuring opponents apologized today, explaining that the “kill shots” they took were simply awkward attempts at humor. [Read More]

JEREMY LIN SETS KNICKS RECORD FOR NOT SUCKING

JEREMY LIN SETS KNICKS RECORD FOR NOT SUCKING

NEW YORK (SatireWire.com) – With seven consecutive strong games under his belt, point guard sensation Jeremy Lin has set a New York Knicks franchise record for not sucking. [Read More]

SENIOR COMMITS TO TELLING FOLKS HE WAS RECRUITED BY ALABAMA

SENIOR COMMITS TO TELLING FOLKS HE WAS RECRUITED BY ALABAMA

NORFOLK, VA. (SatireWire.com) -- Ending a dramatic 24 hours for college football, Jimmy Taswell-Berk, a second-string senior quarterback and one of the nation’s most mediocre high school players, has committed to telling drunk girls at parties that he was recruited by the [Read More]

JESUS LEAVES BRONCOS, SIGNS WITH PATRIOTS

JESUS LEAVES BRONCOS, SIGNS WITH PATRIOTS

BOSTON (SatireWire.com) – Tired of living in Tim Tebow’s shadow, Jesus Christ left the Denver Broncos today and signed as a free agent with the New England Patriots, who will face Denver in an intriguing AFC playoff game on Saturday. [Read More]

PENN STATE, SYRACUSE TO FACE OFF IN DENIAL BOWL

PENN STATE, SYRACUSE TO FACE OFF IN DENIAL BOWL

HOUSTON, TX (SatireWire.com) – Penn State and Syracuse will face each other in the inaugural BP-Herman Cain-Blackberry-Catholic Church Denial Bowl on Christmas morning, school officials announced today. [Read More]

RAYS PLAN PLAYER’S DEATH TO INSPIRE VICTORY

RAYS PLAN PLAYER’S DEATH TO INSPIRE VICTORY

TAMPA, FL (SatireWire.com) – Eight games behind the division leaders and losing confidence, the Tampa Bay Rays today announced one of their players will have to be killed in order to inspire the team to win the championship in his memory. [Read More]

NOAH APOLOGIZES, SAYS ANTI-GAY REMARK WAS TOTALLY GAY

NOAH APOLOGIZES, SAYS ANTI-GAY REMARK WAS TOTALLY GAY

CHICAGO (SatireWire.com) -- In an in-depth interview on ESPN, Chicago Bulls forward Joakim Noah apologized again for making an anti-gay remark to a fan during a recent playoff game, saying his words were stupid and totally gay. [Read More]

BULLS GET CRUCIAL NEW TATTOOS DURING WIN

BULLS GET CRUCIAL NEW TATTOOS DURING WIN

CHICAGO (SatireWire.com) -- The Chicago Bulls took game one from the Miami Heat 103-82 on Sunday thanks to hot shooting from point guard Derrick Rose and a crucial 3rd quarter timeout where the team got new tattoos. [Read More]

TIRED OF FAVRE, GOD COLLAPSES METRODOME

TIRED OF FAVRE, GOD COLLAPSES METRODOME

MINNEAPOLIS, MINN. (SatireWire.com) – Declaring He’s “about had it up to here,” a frustrated God said today the collapse of the Metrodome roof on Sunday was not a blessing in disguise for Brett Favre, but a rather obvious message, He thought, to the injured Vikings [Read More]

TIGER WOODS IS A TWIT(TER)

TIGER WOODS IS A TWIT(TER)

WINDEREMERE, FL (SatireWire.com) -- His reputation destroyed by addictions to sex and himself, Tiger Woods began using his Twitter account today, his advisors hoping a chatty, down-to-earth persona will somehow make people forget he's Tiger Woods. What follows is the [Read More]

 Page 2 of 3 « 1  2  3 »

Latest Topics

FAKE DRUG COMPANIES RACING TO CREATE PHONY EBOLA VACCINE

FAKE DRUG COMPANIES RACING TO CREATE PHONY EBOLA VACCINE

NASHVILLE (SatireWire.com) -- With the world in a near-panic, fake pharmaceutical companies and Internet ‘medical [Read More]

SECRET SERVICE HEAD RESIGNS; OBAMA ‘PSYCHED’ TO SLEEP W/O GUN

SECRET SERVICE HEAD RESIGNS; OBAMA ‘PSYCHED’ TO SLEEP W/O GUN

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- President Obama accepted the resignation of Secret Service Director Julia Pierson [Read More]

SCOTS VOTE TO STAY IN UK; “YES” VOTERS TO BE HANGED AS REBELS

SCOTS VOTE TO STAY IN UK; “YES” VOTERS TO BE HANGED AS REBELS

LONDON (SatireWire.com) -- Declaring the rebels “will pay with their lives,” Queen Elizabeth II today revealed [Read More]

GOD DEFENDS SCENES OF SEX, VIOLENCE IN LIFE ON EARTH

GOD DEFENDS SCENES OF SEX, VIOLENCE IN LIFE ON EARTH

EDINBURGH (SatireWire.com) – The Lord God Almighty, executive producer of the long-running Life on Earth, has [Read More]

DAN AND BENJI, NOT GOD, WORK IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS

DAN AND BENJI, NOT GOD, WORK IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS

(SatireWire.com) -- In a surprising disclosure, God revealed this week that He does not determine what happens in human [Read More]

Recent Comments

DAN AND BENJI WORK IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS | SatireWire | dot.com.edy had this to say

— In a surprising disclosure, God revealed this week that He does not determine what happens in human lives, but Read the post

??ac chanel vintage had this to say

??ac chanel vintage... Hi there! I could have sworn I've been to this web site before but after browsing through a few Read the post

nouveau maillot equipe de france 2014 had this to say

nouveau maillot equipe de france 2014... I am quite enjoyed for this weblog. Its an educational subject. It support me Read the post

??haussure football had this to say

??haussure football... Woah! I'm really digging the template/theme of this site. It's simple, yet effective. A lot of Read the post

bayern trikot 2014 had this to say

bayern trikot 2014... ultimatebb.php?ubb=get_topic... Read the post

Archives

Crazy Slots Casino