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BRAWL ERUPTS AT WORLD ECONOMIC FORUM WEIGH-IN

BRAWL ERUPTS AT WORLD ECONOMIC FORUM WEIGH-IN

Gates Bites AOL Rival; Critics Call for End to “Weigh-In Circuses” New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – After a massive brawl involving hundreds of world leaders and business heavyweights, World Economic Forum organizers today said they may discontinue the [Read More]

ATONING FOR MISTAKES, ANDERSEN FINALLY DOES RIGHT THING, CHANGES COMPANY NAME

ATONING FOR MISTAKES, ANDERSEN FINALLY DOES RIGHT THING, CHANGES COMPANY NAME

“Those Guys Were a Disgrace. Thank God We’re Not Them,” Say Probitium Execs Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – In a strong sign that accounting firm Arthur Andersen finally understands the extent of the trouble it has caused and is willing to do [Read More]

SURPRISE SETTLEMENT EVENLY SPLITS MICROSOFT; ONE FIRM TO MAKE SOFTWARE, OTHER TO MAKE PATCHES

SURPRISE SETTLEMENT EVENLY SPLITS MICROSOFT; ONE FIRM TO MAKE SOFTWARE, OTHER TO MAKE PATCHES

Decision Keeps Redmond from Monopolizing Massive Microsoft Patch Industry Redmond, Wash. (SatireWire.com) – In a surprise settlement today with nine U.S. states, Microsoft agreed to be split into two independent companies – one that will continue to make [Read More]

ENRON CHAIRMAN QUITS TO JOIN NIGERIAN FIRM

ENRON CHAIRMAN QUITS TO JOIN NIGERIAN FIRM

“The Nigerian (or 419) Letter is one of the oldest and most widespread scams that has ever been perpetrated on the planet.” – U.S. Better Business Bureau “Enron … (was) possibly the greatest Ponzi scheme of all time.” – [Read More]

ENRON CEO KEN LAY’S NEWEST VENTURE

ENRON CEO KEN LAY’S NEWEST VENTURE

CLICK HERE TO READ RELATED NEWS STORY ______________________________________________________ ENERGY NATIONAL RESOURCE ORGANIZATION of NIGERIA URGENT BUSINESS PROPOSAL PERSONAL AND CONFIDENTIAL From: Mr. Chairman Kenneth Lay Office of E.N.R.O.N. Director Dear Sir/Madam, This [Read More]

ENRON ADMITS IT’S REALLY ARGENTINA

ENRON ADMITS IT’S REALLY ARGENTINA

Now Massive Ineptitude, Corruption Make More Sense, Analysts Say Houston, Texas (SatireWire.com) – Energy company Enron, which collapsed due to gross mismanagement and insurmountable debt, today confessed to what many observers had long suspected: it is actually [Read More]

CONGRESS FORBIDS ECONOMY TO RECOVER UNTIL CONGRESS PASSES BILL TO HELP ECONOMY RECOVER

CONGRESS FORBIDS ECONOMY TO RECOVER UNTIL CONGRESS PASSES BILL TO HELP ECONOMY RECOVER

“Mississippi Sen. Trent Lott, the Republican leader, said he thought that `we need to fish or cut bait (on a stimulus package) this coming week’ because there are indications the economy could be recovering.” – AP, Dec. 10, 2001 Partisan Bickering [Read More]

PHILIP MORRIS TO CHANGE NAME TO ALTRIA; LUNG CANCER TO CHANGE NAME TO PHILIP MORRIS

PHILIP MORRIS TO CHANGE NAME TO ALTRIA; LUNG CANCER TO CHANGE NAME TO PHILIP MORRIS

Rebranded Disease Gains Universal Negative Brand Imagery New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – Just days after Philip Morris declared it will change its name to the Altria Group, lung cancer today announced it will change its name to Philip Morris. According to lung [Read More]

WITH MORE TIME TO SHOP, THE UNEMPLOYED SHOULD BOOST HOLIDAY SALES, SAYS GOVERNMENT

WITH MORE TIME TO SHOP, THE UNEMPLOYED SHOULD BOOST HOLIDAY SALES, SAYS GOVERNMENT

Bush Urges Unemployed to Be Patriotic, Stay Unemployed Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – A bleak jobless claims report released Thursday put the number of out of work Americans at its highest level in 19 years, but government economists quickly pointed to a [Read More]

JUSTICE TO BREAK UP APPLE FOR TURNING MICROSOFT INTO MONOPOLY

JUSTICE TO BREAK UP APPLE FOR TURNING MICROSOFT INTO MONOPOLY

Alternative OS Maker Used Anti-Competitive Practices Against Itself Redmond, Wash. (SatireWire.com) – Microsoft and the U.S. Justice Department Friday announced a settlement in their landmark anti-trust case that calls for the break up of Apple Computer, as both sides [Read More]

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TRUMP WILL DEPLOY RUSSIAN TROOPS TO PURGE U.S. DEEP STATE

TRUMP WILL DEPLOY RUSSIAN TROOPS TO PURGE U.S. DEEP STATE

President Donald Trump today accepted an offer by Russian President Vladimir Putin to use “impartial” Russian [Read More]

GOP MAY RECONSIDER PLAN TO RUN SLATE OF RACIST PEDOPHILES IN ’18

GOP MAY RECONSIDER PLAN TO RUN SLATE OF RACIST PEDOPHILES IN ’18

BIRMINGHAM, AL - Following Roy Moore’s surprise loss to Democrat Doug Jones in the Alabama Senate race Tuesday, the [Read More]

For White Men to Survive, We Need to Start Acting Like Prey

For White Men to Survive, We Need to Start Acting Like Prey

In order to survive, we straight, white, Christian males need to stop acting like predators and begin acting like prey. [Read More]

TEENAGER USES ROY MOORE DEFENSE

TEENAGER USES ROY MOORE DEFENSE

FATHER: Son, did you steal $20 from your mother’s purse? SON: No. [Read More]

PAUL RYAN RUSHED TO HOSPITAL AFTER ERECTION LASTS MORE THAN 4 HOURS

PAUL RYAN RUSHED TO HOSPITAL AFTER ERECTION LASTS MORE THAN 4 HOURS

House Speaker Paul Ryan was rushed to a hospital today after negotiations over House and Senate tax reform bills caused [Read More]

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