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MICROSOFT WILL ADMIT TO AFFAIR WITH LEWINSKY

MICROSOFT WILL ADMIT TO AFFAIR WITH LEWINSKY

Company, Like President, Indiscreet; Should Get Same Killer Deal, Says Ballmer Redmond, Wash. (SatireWire.com) – Only hours after President Clinton struck a deal to avoid prosecution by admitting he lied in court about Monica Lewinsky, Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer [Read More]

“HACKERS-FOR-NADER” DELIVER SURPRISE VICTORY

“HACKERS-FOR-NADER” DELIVER SURPRISE VICTORY

Group’s ‘Get Out and Change the Vote’ Campaign Influences Dozens of Races WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – The Oval Office was snatched away from Al Gore and George W. Bush Wednesday when the International Brotherhood of Computer Hackers, urging [Read More]

SOUTH DAKOTA GOES DIGITAL

SOUTH DAKOTA GOES DIGITAL

PIERRE, S.D. (SatireWire.com) – As his first act in office, Gov. Jim Barksdale signed an executive order today renaming the state “E-Dakota.” The state’s 860,000 residents, as well as livestock, personal belongings, and public and private buildings, [Read More]

NEW GOVERNMENT PORTAL DESIGN LEAKED

NEW GOVERNMENT PORTAL DESIGN LEAKED

“A new computer system will offer one-stop shopping for online information about the federal government, President Clinton said Saturday. Logging on to one Web site, firstgov.gov, will yield links to all federal information available publicly over the Internet, [Read More]

BUSH TO GRADS: ‘I HAVE A GAS PROBLEM’

BUSH TO GRADS: ‘I HAVE A GAS PROBLEM’

President’s Attempt to Show Empathy Backfires, So to Speak New Haven, Conn. (SatireWire.com) – President George W. Bush made a less-than-stellar return to his alma mater Saturday, where his attempt to convince Yale University graduates that he truly shared their [Read More]

GOD NAMES NEXT “CHOSEN PEOPLE”; IT’S JEWS AGAIN

GOD NAMES NEXT “CHOSEN PEOPLE”; IT’S JEWS AGAIN

Jews, whose troubled, 10,000-year term as God's "chosen people" finally expired last night, woke up this morning to find that they had once again been hand-picked by the Almighty. Synagogues across the globe declared a day of mourning. [Read More]

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GOD DEFENDS SCENES OF SEX, VIOLENCE IN LIFE ON EARTH

GOD DEFENDS SCENES OF SEX, VIOLENCE IN LIFE ON EARTH

EDINBURGH (SatireWire.com) – The Lord God Almighty, executive producer of the long-running Life on Earth, has [Read More]

DAN AND BENJI, NOT GOD, WORK IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS

DAN AND BENJI, NOT GOD, WORK IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS

(SatireWire.com) -- In a surprising disclosure, God revealed this week that He does not determine what happens in human [Read More]

U.S. TROOPS TO FIGHT EACH OTHER TILL MIDDLE EAST SORTS ITSELF OUT

U.S. TROOPS TO FIGHT EACH OTHER TILL MIDDLE EAST SORTS ITSELF OUT

BAGHDAD (SatireWire.com) – With the Middle East hopelessly fractured and America's allies increasingly [Read More]

STRONG SALES PROVE AMERICANS WOULD RATHER DIE IN A CHEVROLET

STRONG SALES PROVE AMERICANS WOULD RATHER DIE IN A CHEVROLET

DETROIT (SatireWire.com) – Despite breaking industry records for safety recalls, General Motors this week announced [Read More]

GM SPLITS INTO SEPARATE CAR-MAKING, CAR-RECALLING DIVISIONS

GM SPLITS INTO SEPARATE CAR-MAKING, CAR-RECALLING DIVISIONS

DETROIT (SatireWire.com) – General Motors today announced it will split into separate car-making and car-recalling [Read More]

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