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PEACE CORPS EXPANDS TO COVER SUDAN, ERITREA, CARNIVAL CRUISES
WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- The Peace Corps today announced it will expand its third-world missions by regularly sending volunteers to Sudan, Eritrea, and Carnival Cruise Lines. [Read More]
STEVEN CHU SULKING OVER U.S. GOVT NOT GETTING WIPED OUT
WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- Sulking Energy Secretary Steven Chu, the cabinet member designated to sit out the State of the Union address in the event the entire U.S. leadership was killed, has been unable to hide his disappointment ever since the President returned [Read More]
BOEING INTRODUCES THE NEW 797 DREAMDRONE
CHICAGO (SatireWire.com) -- Targeting the growing drone market, Boeing today unveiled the 797 Dreamdrone, describing it as the largest, most comfortable and passenger-friendly unmanned aircraft ever made and not at all one of their defective 787 Dreamliners with the windows [Read More]
USPS WORKERS LOSE OPTION TO GO POSTAL ON SATURDAYS
OLYMPIA, WA (SatireWire.com) -- The United States Postal Service’s decision to cease Saturday mail delivery was disappointing news to veteran letter carriers across the country who say they will now never get the opportunity to go postal on a weekend. [Read More]
“RICHARD III” UPDATED TO ACCOUNT FOR CAR PARK, TRAFFIC ISSUES
LEICESTER, ENGLAND (SatireWire.com) – After learning that the remains of Richard III were found under a car park in Leicester, and not on Bosworth Field, Shakespeare scholars have moved quickly to update the classic tragedy to account for parking and traffic issues. Read [Read More]
NRA RESEARCH FINDS GUN CRIME RAMPANT BEFORE GUNS INVENTED
FAIRFAX, VA (SatireWire.com) -- Expanding on their theory that more guns lead to less gun crime, and therefore fewer guns lead to more gun crime, NRA-backed researchers today said they have worked out that before guns were invented, everyone on the planet was killed by a [Read More]
PEOPLE GET FLU WAITING IN LINE FOR FLU SHOTS
BOSTON, MA (SatireWire.com) -- Americans crowding into hospitals, clinics and doctor’s offices to get flu shots are now the number one cause of the spread of the flu, according to the Centers for Disease Control. [Read More]
CONGRESS WELCOMES FIRST OPENLY BIPARTISAN REPRESENTATIVE
WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – History was made Friday as Rep. Alice Healy of Wisconsin became the first openly bipartisan member of Congress. [Read More]
LUCKY S&P ANALYST CAN’T BELIEVE HE GETS TO DOWNGRADE U.S. AGAIN
NEW YORK, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – Less than two years after downgrading the credit rating of the United States – a historical first -- Standard & Poor’s analyst Gary Gardener cannot believe he may get the chance to do it again. [Read More]
TO HONOR FISCAL CLIFF, NEW YEAR’S BALL TO FALL OFF BUILDING, SMASH
NEW YORK (SatireWire.com) – In honor of the fiscal cliff’s 2013 arrival, Times Square organizers today said this New Year’s Eve, the gigantic crystal ball will slide down its traditional 77-foot flagpole, then plunge another 395 feet to the ground, where it will smash [Read More]
