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Wednesday September 18th 2013    Become a Fan on Facebook   Follow Us On Twitter

Authority

U.S. DIPLOMAT EXPLAINS WHY SYRIAN CIVILIANS MUST KEEP DYING

(SatireWire.com) – U.S. State Department transcript of a cell phone call between Palmer Greavey, Under Deputy Secretary for the Assistant Secretary of the U.S. Deputy [Read More]

ARIEL CASTRO HANGS SELF AFTER NOT GETTING ‘50 SHADES’ LEAD

CLEVELAND, OHIO (SatireWire.com) -- Convicted kidnapper and sexual abuser Ariel Castro hanged himself in his prison cell late Tuesday only hours after learning he had failed [Read More]

RADICAL ANAGRAMISTS HOLD SHE-GOATS FOR RANSOM

SHAGWINTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- A group of radical anagramists today claimed it has taken four she-goats and demanded $1 million in omen masonry payable in small, kind [Read More]

International

ISRAEL CLAIMS IT JUST HAPPENED TO BE BOMBING IN NEIGHBORHOOD

By An Israeli Warplane -- I know, right? I looks kinda awkward that I “just happened” to bomb Damascus Sunday, but that’s what happened. It wasn’t, like, planned or [Read More]

Sci/Tech

MYSTERY DISEASE AFFECTS ONE IN NEARLY EVERY HUMAN BEING

ATLANTA (SatireWire) -- It is known by many names: Common Fulgent Peplepsia, The Kitchen [Read More]

NASA TURNS OFF SPACE TELESCOPES, GOES OUTSIDE

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Saying everyone had spent more than enough time [Read More]

DESIGNER #HASHTAGS THE LATEST TREND IN TRENDING

NEW YORK, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – The common #hashtag, once the telltale sign of [Read More]

Business

FLORIDA’S NEWEST AMUSEMENT PARK: “SINKHOLELAND”

DADE CITY, FL (SatireWire.com) – Cinderella’s Missing Castle, Unnerving Journey to the Center of the Earth, Pirates of the Caribbeneath, Spelunk-a-Dunk – the rides at [Read More]

Sports

NFL PLAYERS MAY FACE HATE CRIMES FOR TARGETING UNIFORM COLOR

NEW YORK, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – Nearly 700 National Football League players may be [Read More]

RUTGERS FIRES ABUSIVE COACH, VOWS TO STOP RECRUITING PANSIES

NEW BRUNSWICK, NJ (SatireWire.com) – An apologetic Rutgers University fired men’s [Read More]

ESPN SUSPECTS HACK AS TSINGHUA UNIV. LEADS NCAA BRACKET PICKS

BRISTOL, CT (SatireWire.com) – Every one of the 1.2 billion NCAA tournament brackets [Read More]

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