Briefs Archives

RECOMMEND THIS TO A FRIEND

Russian-Pizza Hut Rocket Explodes;
Thin Crust Blamed
Astana, Kazakhstan (SatireWire.com) — The Pizza Hut-sponsored Russian rocket carrying international space station equipment exploded while in orbit today, just days after its launch. Russian Space Agency officials immediately blamed the proton rocket's "thin, crunchy crust," insisting they had ordered a deep dish Pan Proton rocket, which is thicker. Pizza Hut officials, however, argued the Russians could only afford the Thin 'n Crispy®. "If they were so concerned, they shouldn't have ordered the mushrooms and black olives," said company spokesman Rick Cavella. "That was $20 million extra."

On a brighter note, Cavella pointed out that Earth's upper atmosphere is now a tantalizing mouthful of flavors, just dripping with fresh cheese and new tomatoes.

OTHER ARCHIVE 3 BRIEFS

¤ 'I Love You' Email Recipient
   Still Waiting for Flowers, Phone Call

¤ Lucent Finds New COO on Stock Message Board

¤ Firestone Peels Back Prices in Tire Sale Blowout!

¤ Firms Hire Jerks to Improve Customer Service

¤ Analyst Predicts Dow 5,000 by 1996

¤ Bush Promises Republican Internet If Elected

¤ Wrigley Launches "Internet Bubble" Gum®

¤ Amazon Says Stock Price "Mislabeled"

¤ Post Office Leads Way in New "Paper Technology"

¤ Small Tech Stocks Fall; Big, Slow, Dumb Stocks Rise

¤ RIAA Demands End to Unauthorized Humming, Whistling

¤ Taco Bell Fires Chihuahua; New Chalupa "Tastes Funny"

¤ Fired eBay Employees Auctioned Off

¤ Starving, Dying Poor to Get Much-Needed Net Access

¤ House Sends Spam Bill to Senate; Senate Spam Filter Deletes It

¤ Yahoo Beats Analysts' Estimates, Dogs

¤ Pizza Hut-Sponsored Russian Rocket Explodes; Thin Crust Blamed

¤ Domino's-Sponsored Rocket Late, Probably Cold

¤ Greenspan: "I'm More Popular than Jesus"

¤ Windows Not a Virus

Copyright © 2000, SatireWire.

Office Outlook Essentials - Excel add-ins for work automation - Technology news - plumbing supply house - Sell Houses Fast for Cash - DirectoryDump Web Directory - Edinburgh hotels - tyres - Panic Attacks and Anxiety Disorders