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Battered MP3 Says Its "Only Flesh Wound"

New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) — MP3.com, which had its financial legs cut out from under it by a federal judge yesterday, said it was only a flesh wound, and insisted the music industry come back and fight like a man.

"It's nothing! Come back, you cowards, and prepare to do battle!" said the company, which lost its case with Seagram's Universal Music Group. MP3 had previously been beaten by other recording companies to the tune of $100 million. "I can't lose, I'm invincible!" MP3 added. The victorious Universal Music rolled its eyes and left with an estimated $118 million to $250 million.

"All right, we'll call it a draw, then!" MP3 screamed as its foe walked away.

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